Feel like pregnancy makes you a magnet for unwanted advice?
From the endless rabbit holes of online forums to the well-meaning tips from grandmas, aunts, and coworkers… it can sometimes feel like everyone has an opinion about how you should navigate your pregnancy and parenting.
And while most of it comes from a place of love and good intentions, the sheer volume of unsolicited advice can get overwhelming, fast.
The tricky part is really fielding all this input without hurting feelings or causing family drama.
I put together 3 things you can do or say when someone comes at you with advice you didn’t ask for
- Acknowledge Their Good Intentions
Most of the time, when people give you advice, they’re genuinely trying to be helpful, even if it doesn’t feel that way.
Starting with a little acknowledgment can go a long way in keeping things calm and kind.
You could say something like, “Thanks for sharing that! I can tell you care a lot, and I really appreciate it.”
Then, follow it up with something like, “We’ve been thinking a lot about this and feel good about the path we’ve chosen.”
It’s a nice way of saying, I hear you, but I’ve got this covered. A little validation can diffuse any tension and make it easier to set boundaries if the advice keeps coming.
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- Change the Subject
Sometimes, it’s less about shutting them down and more about shifting the conversation in a way that feels natural. If the advice starts to get overwhelming, you can redirect the focus.
For example, you could say, “Oh, that’s interesting! It’s amazing how everyone has such different experiences. Speaking of which, how are your kids doing?”
Another option is to lean into humor a little to keep things light, like saying, “You know, I’ve heard so many different opinions on this – I could write a whole book!”
The idea is to move the conversation away from your pregnancy decisions without making anyone feel dismissed.
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- Be Confident and Clear About Your Choices
At the end of the day, you’re the one living this experience, and it’s okay to gently but firmly let others know you’ve already made up your mind.
If someone keeps pushing advice you’re not asking for, you can say something like, “That’s a good point. We’ve actually talked to our doctor about this, and we feel really good about the plan we have.”
Or you could try, “I’ve done a lot of reading on this, and I feel confident about our decision, but I really appreciate your thoughts.”
It’s not rude, but it also makes it clear that you’re standing by your choices. Most people will back off once they realize you’re comfortable with your plan.
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At the end of the day this is your pregnancy, your body, and your baby!
You actually don’t owe anyone an explanation for the choices you’re making, and it’s 100% okay to set boundaries that keep you feeling calm and confident.
Most people just want to help, even if their advice feels like a lot, and with a little kindness (and a few solid responses in your back pocket), you can keep things drama-free while staying true to yourself.
